Lonely.. =(

After all of the goals, stress, and pressure... everything has finally wound down. No more parties or papers... no more AP exams (woot!!!!!)... and no more friends. =(

I'm so sorry for sounding/being so emo, but everyone is leaving this week! Timmy left last Thursday for India (right after graduation! grr.), Junki left Monday for Japan, Sumi leaves today for India, Hope leaves tomorrow for the keys/bahamas/somewhere carribbeanish, and Anqi leaves tomorrow for China.

What am I supposed to do? Read ALL day?!

It's so weird to have everything go away so suddenly just like that. I feel like I've had a weird tunnel vision for so long that's just been shut off without warning.

=(

Partied Out!

I have not eaten dinner at home once in the past week. =O I've been going to graduation party after graduation party and get-together after get-together, and I am TIRED. But I can't miss out on these last few opportunities to be with everyone at once! People are leaving for India, China, etc., left and right! It's like we are loosing friends one by one.. =(.

My mom called me a party girl today (What?? ME??? lol.) just because I have been going to a bunch of graduation parties one after the other and haven't been home much at all. She said she was going to have a serious talk with Hope to ask her to stop me from partying at Georgia next year. Bwahahahaha, like she even needs to do that? Would I honestly choose partying over studying? Heck no! My mom is ridonculous!

Something else on my mind lately: this crazy clarinet audition packet! I mean, what the crap?! Who does McClellan (UGA clarinet professor) think he is? The clarinet god?!?!? Well, he is really freaking good... but still. There are so many classics in the packet: from the simple, standard (that I have yet to finish.. crap.) Mozart concerto in A major to the crazy Shostakovich noodles and Debussy. It makes sense that the audition material is super hard considering some of the people auditioning intend to be music majors. But, for me, for the purposes of playing clarinet for fun on the side while pursuing a science major... this is going to be tough. But hey, playing music is fun, so this challenge will be fun yeah??

Happy birthday, Junki!! =)

Graduated!!!!!!

I cannot believe this... but... the class of 2009 has GRADUATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D

I'm not quite as excited as I seem to be in the previous sentence. It's all been very surreal. Cliche as this sounds, I feel like I'm just watching it all happen to someone else.

It's as if nothing has changed. I don't think we are more mature.. especially not those dumb losers who kept talking and being rude during the whole ceremony (I threw angry glances at them and said Shhh!! a lot. So what if I am mean. They deserve it.). And we haven't really changed. We're just... done. With high school.. O.O weird.

Even though I'll probably never see some of these kids ever again in my life, I know that I will meet the ones who have been important to me again. This can't be the end of everything.

And despite all that I believed... I did not cry last night. No one really did...

Maybe we are all still in shock?



P.S. -- I love you guys.
(Sorry! The big group pictures aren't uploaded yet..!)

~*~

Plans for the Summer??

1. Have fun chilling with friends and spending loads of time with them before we all leave for COLLEGE! I'll miss you guys!! =(
2. Go to China. Be with family.. have a BLAST! (and hopefully not get quarantined for swine flu)....
3. Learn to cook/be domestic. Seriously.
4. Relearn calculus and brush up on chemistry. (hahaha.. YEA RIGHT.)
5. read, read, read, read, read!!!!!!!!!!
6. be a Camera whore (check!)
7. work out. =D
8. clean my room... =/ Uhhhh I don't know about this
9. RELAX
10. STOP MAKING LISTS. PERIOD.

A Bigger Cage

Something interesting Sumi said to me the other day before competing in Ecology at nationals: "I feel like in 3 days, I will be free... like a little bird that's been released from it's cage. Except this time, I'll be leaving the small high school cage into a bigger college/life cage.. it's still a cage, but there's more room to fly." That's pretty depressing, deep, and optimistic at the same time. She's definitely right about the being free part. I feel completely relaxed and free now that high school is over and we are just waiting to graduate. I'll worry about that other cage later... =P

I just have to rant about a few itty-bitty teensy-weensy things. More like whine. So bear with me or ignore. And what follows may be super offensive, but I don't care.

1. Senior Laniards. So, apparently when Anqi and I went to school today and dropped by the graduation teacher's room, she told us that the sophomores are in charge of the senior breakfast and the senior stuff (aka laniards) and getting the funds to get those things for us. And this year (unsurprisingly due to the recession) there was a lack of funds from the sophomore class. So. They chose to buy us donuts at the senior breakfast as opposed to laniards for our keys. Hm... I just have one question. Why in the world would they choose donuts over laniards?!??! Do they think that we can't just walk out and get donuts at Krispy Kreme some day?! I mean, the senior laniards last forever and each class before us has gotten one! Someday a few years later, I'll be like no I do not have memorabilia from my senior year because we got donuts instead? That we ate and digested 7 years ago?!?! What crap. I am sad. Heck, I didn't even eat a donut at the senior breakfast.

2. Honor Grads. Another reason why I feel ripped off this year. The honor grads don't get to walk together at the front of the line this year. I guess it isn't a big deal, but I really would have liked to walk with Timmy at graduation. That would be so amazing. But no. Some graduate from last year was sad that walking behind the honor grads made them feel "degraded." And so the school took this to heart and bumped everyone in alphabetical order. So just because you chose to be a slacker for 4 years means you want everyone else to be the same. Thank you capital society for honoring that wish. Whatever, those chords spread out around the non-chords will just make the honor grads look more honored and the non-honor grads more naked.... =( I still don't get to walk with Timmy.

Now that all of that is out of my system....

I can't wait for graduation! It's only 2 more days before we get to march and throw up our hats! I am so excited. I can't believe this is it!

Science Olympiad Nationals!

Here I am sitting in a hotel room in Augusta, Georgia with all but 5 of my team mates celebrating the end of a journey. (Wow, excuse the cliche but it is like 1am in the morning and my brain cells have been fried by SO.) .... and I think I am falling asleep so I will update later. =)

Senior Letters and Regrets

The night before the senior breakfast I am sitting at home scrambling to finish these last few letters to my childhood friends. Typical. Since when did doing fun/interesting things like writing letters to friends become unwanted drudgery?

Something I really regret about these senior letters (and about high school in general): the friends or... former friends whom I don't know whether or not to write a letter to. It makes me really regret all of the friendships that I've lost in the past 4 years and cherish the ones I've made so much more. It's not that I actively burned these bridges... they just fell apart. Like the steps were crumbling before I even began to notice that people were falling away from me. Maybe I didn't put enough effort. Or, maybe, (the lazy way of thinking) things just weren't the same anymore. Whatever it was, I am extremely sad about losing these amazing people in my life. I don't know if there is anyway (or if there is a point?) to patch them up. But, I do know that for the rest of my life, I will do the best I can to keep these things from happening. Of course, some of it is natural, but the ones that may be caused by me or even catalyzed by me will stop. It is just too sad to loose such great people...

To write or not to write? I don't know...

Book List =)

Here are some books that I want to read this summer. Enjoy! =)















Most of them are pretty much YA novels. But, that's the genre I've been looking into recently... =P

I'll update this list later. It's study time. (grr!!)

Lazy, Lazy, Lazy

I've been such a bum lately. It's nothing new, but it just seems more intense lately.

Therefore, I have not updated. Plus, there isn't much to say. School ends in about 1.5 weeks, nationals are coming up, and it's almost pool time! (YES!)

Studying for AP exams isn't really a priority. =(

Sigh.